Creative block

Just a few moments ago I was looking at the stars thinking about what would I write about. “Write how we don’t see the stars in their full glory anymore and how our ancestor had probably different relationship with the night sky than we have.” (Okay this is an interesting topic, but not for today.)

And after the time, that I am writing I have found out that the best well what best means, the ones that I enjoy writing and sharing are the ones that I feel called to. A bit uncomfortable to share sometimes, or just really exciting ones. I am losing the line here. back to a topic.

“Oh no it’s getting long” while starting at the over bubbled paragraph feeling lost again, of what I wanted to express. I was just sitting and staring at the computer, empty.

This is how I would describe a creative block. I went back from computer to handwriting and hoped it would get better. It’s not that I didn’t have the topics. I just wasn’t drawn to them. Maybe just tired too?

So one just waits. Waiting to be taken, a spark of thoughts that would come with this well known feeling; “here we go there is your connection to muse” It wasn’t here.

I experience it multiple times today, and once when I was really trying to come up with a present for my niece. Just sitting staring to the side not really focusing on anything just staring. “Let’s play another YouTube video,” hoping it would come with it.

There were ideas but all felt like used ones: “No, not another drawing.” I was even noticing this grumpiness hovering over almost all the ideas. “Let’s go outside my head”, took a paper and started to draw just whatever. Just to do something.

It almost is like you are freeing, cleaning your mind out of the ideas that are the “used” ones. When doing this I encounter: “Okay, what does she really enjoy?” I felt a bit of uncomfortable feeling, because I’ve had a hard time finding out the answer.

But there among the “uncle role” regrets, I noticed this sparkling feeling over a thought: “You know how you call each other ‘human’, create something out of this!”

From that moment on, I had an idea I could follow. It’s just something I smiled over, while imagining giving it to her. Something we can laugh over and have a small experience of joy.

Yeah creative block, this is my third draft today. What I did writing this article is that; I just started. You almost like just write and then when you get lost you come back and ask yourself again: “What do I want to write about.”

In each iteration of the draft you take something and clean your head from the stuff you already don’t want to or don’t feel like called to.

Hopefully it makes, sense.

The insight with creative block is probably this.

Clean your mind from the ideas that you already pooped over as a not good ones. Write them down, put them outside and notice when doing so what parts of the ideas you liked. Then make this as your point where to direct yourself.

It’s a feeling game, a game to be connected and drawn to whatever you are doing. Therefor it’s hard to describe by words, so go follow your feelings.

Pointing at a sticky figure on a paper I asked her: “Do you know what is this?” She said: “Yeah, it’s human.” and we smiled. Insider joke you know.

It wasn’t the best one, but she showed it to her father.

Okay, have a nice night (it felt strange to write nice sleep) and see ya tomorrof,

Bye, Luke

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