The Unnatural Pooping Position Complicating the Unloading Process.
Please take this seriously. It’s really important for you to take this seriously. Otherwise, there would be no pooping revolution.
Have you ever notice how when you sit on our toilets it pushes your load back?
Like, I was recently breathing to my belly, everything deep breaths and it rewarded me with a poop need. “I don’t see that on the label. Hey mom! Do you know something about the connection between abdominal breathing and poops?”
So, full of anticipation, I went on a toilet. Okay, first I let the fresh air come in, after my predecessor. While I was wasting time texting and walking around, I could feel the preparedness of it all. “Hey buddy we are ready, just signal us.”
Finally, did the squad and felt how everything was pushed back. “What the frick is this?”
And I immediately became envious of people in India. Like they have their toilets made for more natural position. You do full squad and then wipe your ass with water on the left side. I don’t envy the hugging though. Hugging needs to be strange. “Don’t fucking put the left hand on me”
No really, have you thought how unnatural this sitting unloading is? Horrible stuff. I don’t know who designed chairs, but he was lazy. I’m sure of that! I can see myself doing it.
So, I lifted my feet and tried to simulate the natural position better. If this is too descriptive please bear with me, revolution needs us brave. I need something under my feet for the small elevation. Kids have advantage they can fall into it.
Or the baby pooping devices. You know those that you can move around and have heads of seals? Those do you think they have adult versions too? It seems like the position is better there. You are closer to the ground. Like a sports car.
Yeah, pooping time,